“It doesn’t really matter because you’re going to be a stay-at-home wife anyway.” These were the words Lisa Bilyeu’s father shared with her after he realized she was serious about studying filmmaking. Growing up in a “very traditional Greek” household, Bilyeu, Co-Founder of Quest Nutrition and Impact Theory Media Studios, took no offense to the conclusion. “He didn’t say it to be mean,” Bilyeu affectionately explains. “But that was definitely the Greek mentality when it came to women.”
Despite her family’s perspective on what a woman’s role should be, Bilyeu still hoped to break barriers for women in film, but she and her husband Tom needed equity to create the kind of studio and movies that they cared for. Taking a page from Steve Jobs’ handbook on simplifying the daily decision-making process, the two decided to spend 1 year assuming traditional marital roles – Tom working outside of the house and Lisa as the stay-at-home wife she had been groomed to be, supporting her husband as he brought in the funds they needed to fuel their dream. But after 8 years of chasing money, no film business to show for it, and both profoundly unhappy, Bilyeu realized the couple had slipped into the kind of monotony she had been trying to avoid all her life and agreed with Tom that he should quit. Coincidentally, Tom’s partners were feeling equally drained by the business they’d built and decided to launch Quest Nutrition, a brand with a mission they loved and could stand behind. With Lisa not working at the time, Tom asked if she would help by fulfilling orders of the company’s protein bars from their living room floor.
“Initially, I wasn’t really involved in it. It was like, okay, I’ll help my husband because for 8 years I had started to train myself and eventually believe that that was my purpose,” Bilyeu states. Using the fear of losing her home and marriage to failure in the business as an incentive to succeed, Bilyeu worked diligently to learn everything she could about the logistics of scaling. Undeterred by the limited expectation placed on her growing up, Bilyeu shared that she helped Quest Nutrition grow an astounding 57,000% in 3 years’ time, earning a billion-dollar valuation ranking as the #2 fastest growing company in North America by Inc. Magazine in 2014.
Bilyeu believed she could do whatever she put her mind to. However, even with all the accolades given and pride formed, it was apparent that she was still unhappy. Diving deep into a process of self-examination, Bilyeu was eventually able to make a valuable shift in perspective from the fear of losing everything to the delight of working to grow her business. With this change in mindset, Bilyeu began leading a life and career that has allowed her to happily launch her first cooking show with fitness influencer Cassey Ho, build the state-of-the-art set for Inside Quest, co-found Impact Theory Media Studios with husband Tom, become Host and Founder of Impact Theory’s Women Of Impact talk show, and help all of her shows collectively reach over 300 million views. Bilyeu shares here some of the ways she was able to gain the outlook she needed to finally feel like a woman of impact.
Be Clear About Your Passion And Purpose
“Passion for me, is something I feel so internally that I cannot switch off. When I wake up in the morning, I just get so passionate about doing something that I will do it actually sometimes even more to the detriment of my health. Because I am so passionate about it, I cannot stop it. It’s like a fire. A blazing fire,” Bilyeu exclaims. “Purpose, I think is where I use that blazing fire to focus. So my purpose is to impact people, but I have to have the passion and the fire first because if I don’t have that then I actually don’t believe that I am able to serve my purpose.” Remembering her childhood passion for filmmaking allowed Bilyeu to begin looking at the work she had done with Quest as a stepping-stone toward fulfilling the dreams she had before assuming the role of a stay-at-home-wife. Once her passion became clear, it became easier to fulfill her purpose.
Weigh If The Worst Is Worth It
Bilyeu explains that what’s driven her to push past fears and create lasting impact has been looking at the best and worst outcomes and weighing them. “What is the worst that can happen if I share this story? Okay, people may hate me, people might try and shame me, that’s just human nature. But what is the best that can happen? The best that can happen is, my story is about impacting least one person. Now, when I look at it hand in hand – like is the worry of shaming myself, or putting myself down, sharing something that may embarrass me – is that feeling going to outweigh the impact I am going to bring?”
Forget What You ‘Should’ Be Doing
Bilyeu hopes we all understand the importance of finding out what’s best for us and exclusively pursuing those things. For example, faced with excessive self-care advice calling for work/life balance, Bilyeu explains how she initially struggled with the practice and grew anxious, but eventually concluded that for her, balance is BS. “I realized, you know what, I actually don’t want balance. I am not looking for balance. In the words of Lisa Nichols, ‘I am looking for harmony.’ I am looking to be at peace within myself. And in that, for myself, it is actually not a balance.” From her decision to be the only woman in her Greek family married without children to pouring herself into her work instead of traditional wifely duties, Bilyeu wants all women to believe it’s possible for them to forget what they should do and do what they want.
Article Credit: forbes